Mister Michael, riding on a bike-el,
ti-yah caught on fi-yah, it's a unicycle.

GabriELLA thought CinderELLA was like
every Disney movie till she saw Old YELLA.

Misses Mama, voted for Obama,
Doesn't like our dog, but she wants a llama.

Mister Dad, gave us all we had,
But he ate some of my ice-cream and that made me mad!

Misses Gramma, went to Alabama,
Found a bunch of diamonds, but we won't tell Uncle Sam-a.

Mister Grampa is a sniper champ,
But if he stand up quickly he might get a cramp.

I'll tell ya 'bout my Aunt, she never says she can't,
Any time, day or night, she can do a liver transplant.

And then my Uncle Chris is impossible to dis.
Every single year he's at the top of Santa's lis.

Aunt Natasha might seem small, but that is a mirage.
Never underestimate a security guard with a blackbelt in massage.

Uncle Bob is living proof that youth is found within.
I hope that when I reach his age, that I'm as young as him.

Old Miss Muffin, howlin' and wuffin',
She's lookin' round the room, but she can't see nuffin.

Poor Miss HuaHua, sittin' in a sink,
When Mama says "ChiHuaHua" it don't mean what ya think...

Mister Sweet-pea, cuter than a bumble-bee,
pushin' all the other dogs off my knee...

In the never-ending game of dogs, Elmo is a pawn,
But he's the one who still loves you when all the treats are gone.

Who's that listening to everything we say?
It's not the Chinese government, or the CIA.
He's always keeping track of what we do each day,
It's Mobey, over there, sittin' far away.